Monday, May 2, 2011


A modern day study in sociology...
 C.U.B.s or Cashed Up Bogans.
*Language warning. Swear approximations ahead.

Now, I am not a classy bird by any stretch of the imagination.
Hubby proudly tells me, "we're working class, babe" as if I should be honoured.

I do not have air and graces. However, I do have some standards, some limitations and some manners.

I will NOT tolerate 'Shazza' and I own a lot of shoes. Wear them even.

I aspire for my child to have a vocabulary that extends beyond trashy words that begin with f, sh and definitely c.

On a recent camping trip I was granted some in depth insight into a social phenomenon that has swept through Western Australia.

I was in a prime position to study the 'Cashed Up Bogan' in situ and would like to share some of the interesting, amusing and disturbing findings of my research with you.

Thanks to the mining boom and resources trade here in W.A., our population has a new subset. A group of relatively unskilled, hard working, highly paid, often fly in - fly out, employees who work on mine sites throughout the state.

These people have copious amounts of money and love to throw it around.
However, common decency, manners and class don't necessarily have a price tag or come with the massive plasma.

The CUB is easily identified by their overt possession of stuff.
Expensive, top of the range, labelled stuff emblazoned with coarse stickers and generally black on blacker.

They have all the toys - spanking new 4WDs and 7 seaters, quad bikes, trail bikes, BMX bikes, Blu Ray, DVD players, stereos, jet skis, pools, spas, leather recliners, personal trainers, an actual stainless steel fridge to transport and place outside their camper.
(The Mrs CUB in question mentioned more than once that she likes to "sink her beer f_____ cold, mate").

The CUBs have children with cool names like Ryder and Harley. Each apparently having the same unfortunate prefix  of "F___n "and suffix of "you little sh____!".

CUB children generally wander or ride anywhere and everywhere without supervision, a change of clothes, bathing or food.

Not that I blame them for their nomad existence. When they do come within sight of Mrs CUB, the CUB kids get an absolute bollicking of epic proportions. They don't necessarily have to be doing anything wrong to be on the receiving end of tirades punctuated by filth.

The CUB is usually recognised by the cigarette in one hand and beer bottle in the other. CUBs do not believe 9am to be too early for either of these vices.

CUBs appear to subscribe to the belief that "F____n D_____head" is an endearing term for your (current) life partner and should be used prolificly.

They will happily stare down anyone who dares to look sideways at the offensive scene they're playing out in stereo - unfortunately without the bleeps.

CUBs don't seem to have great aspirations for their children. There is no shame in predicting that your kids will be "absolute f______n mugs, mate. No f_______n scientistis and sh___ here".

CUBs gather in the sand dunes to compare wheeled toys, listen to thrash music, talk trash, swill from shared bottles/cartons/casks and parade their latest ugg boot acquisitions.

I could go on, but feel really disgusting for all this almost swearing.

The CUBs of this study were an interesting, foul mouthed bunch. They disgusted and entertained simultaneously.

They (and their mates) are probably responsible for stimulating the local (and Balinese) economy, working hard where many won't and maintaining our healthy population growth.
No offence is intended!

Shar :-)

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