A Newlywed With An Apology

Six weeks today...
A milestone.
The longest stretch of time without one - or both - or all of us in my little family being airborne and away from home in many, many, many months.

For some people this is the norm.
Not us.

I've beaten myself up this year over my discomfort with being apart from my husband for long or indefinite periods of time.

Lots of women 'hold down the fort' very capably for a lot longer than I've ever had to and with more children, greater workloads and less support than I have.

But I'm working towards acceptance of the fact that
a) it's not just the inconvenience of solo parenting such as missing running group, committee meetings, or anything after 7pm that bugs me by week two.
b) it's not only the responsibilty or emotional toll of being on my own that wears me down after a while.
c) it's not the dog poo scooping that irks me most.
d) Mostly I miss my Hubby, my teammate, my partner when he's not here and that's okay.

I have noticed that in recent posts I have been dropping a lot of "Hubby"s.
"Hubby did this... Hubby did that... Hubby says this... Hubby says that..."
Sickening stuff, really.


It reminds me of the early days of a crush or a relationship when you (supposedly subtley) keep dropping the person's name into conversations randomly and make all sorts of (supposedly valid) excuses to walk past their locker/bus stop/home/office.


At times earlier this year the only mentions poor Hubby got in this space were in the context of my distaste for solo parenting while he travelled at the drop of a hat for his new role at work.

My marriage was certainly nowhere near over.
We're both too stubborn for that.
But we had become accustomed to a serious level of independence and were going down the path of two (usually) polite adults cohabitating and sharing one single commonality - in the form of an adorable little boy (okay, two - the sweet boy and the mortgage). 

Since Magoo and I returned from Ireland six weeks ago, Hubby and I seem to have found a new passion for one another, for our marriage and for our little family's future.
It's been beautiful.

We are back to hand holding, snuggling on the couch, making genuine eye contact, bothering to actually share our day's news, making Magoo uncomfortable with PDAs, actually listening to each other, appreciating each other's efforts, choosing to put one another before the rest of the world, cracking pathetic jokes and remembering what it is we love about one another.

Bluuuugh. I know.

If my constant references to Hubby have caused you to vomit into your keyboard or sprain an optic nerve rolling your eyes, I apologise - but accept no liability.
I will, however, provide you with a lovely plastic vomit catcher thing free of charge if you email me your details. I'm all heart.

Hey, we all know that six weeks is usually the 'honeymoon' period of hormone induced bliss for any major life changing event (ie.marriage, babies, new jeans)  - so I may be back to Hubby indifference sometime soon.
I sincerely hope not though.

Loved Up Shar
:-)