Thursday, April 21, 2011

Overthinkers Anonymous

My name is Shar and I'm an overthinker.
I can't go a day without overthinking.

I giggle when I open Facebook and it innocently asks me "What's on your mind?"
Are you kidding??
We'd be here all day.

I would love to know what it feels like to  -
  • go to a 'thing' and not lie awake after hoping that so-and-so wasn't offended when I said such-and-such because I didn't think before I opened my mouth;
  • go to sleep without the aid of a book to help me tune out my own irritating, incessant thoughts;
  • hear or read a complaint / group email  and not immediately assume it must be directed at me;
  • notice a missed call from an unknown number and not wreck my head with the possibilities;
  • make a big purchase and not need 101 justifications to convince myself it was reasonable / necessary / worthy;
  • not hear from Hubby as promised and barely notice;
  • not plan every outing / event / chore in minute detail and just turn up - at an inappropriate time and empty handed even :-0

But then could I live with her?
That carefree, fearless, unaware chick?
(Bet Hubby would love to try!)

Yes, overthinking is dangerous and leads to excessive worry, self criticism, stress, copious lists, pointless preparation for things that never eventuate, ridiculous medical diagnoses...
However, the more I overthink about it, overthinking also equates to thoughtfulness, consideration of others, empathy.
Those qualities that I absolutely treasure in the beautiful people I am lucky enough to have around me.

Apparently, Charlie Chaplin said,
"Go as far as you can see. When you get there you will see further."

I like his advice, I really do. I just think maybe I have super long distance vision?

Of course, the future is clearer as you get closer to it.
Of course I know that there are a million and one variables that will undoubtedly change between now and whenever I am thinking about.
But I can't help it.
No matter how much I think about it.

What do you think?

Shar :-)


Lou said...

You are a nut job, but we love you!

Veronica said...

I overthink things too. Especially blog comments.

And then I spend an inordinate amount of time hoping that I didn't offend anyone accidentally.

My Mummy Daze said...

Totally relate to over-thinking! And I always internalise situations or comments to somehow put the blame on myself. I'm way too self-critical.

Was a good way to hear you frame it though, that without over-thinkers there'd be less considerate and thoughtful folks out there...

Marcy said...

I overthink too, but I have been able to lessen it in recent years--not always though. The worst is when I am suddenly wide awake at 2 a.m. worrying about some little thing. -- Visiting from the Rewind.

4 kids, 20 suitcases and a beagle said...

I'm with Veronica - way to much thought goes in to how I wrote something and if it came across the right way.


Clarabel said...

Better to overthink than be thoughtless :)

Know what you mean though very difficult to switch off sometimes and just let the mind wander.

Visiting from Rewind

MultipleMum said...

I am a pendulum in this arena. I am a natural overthinker who has taught herself not to overthink but who regresses when stressed. The trouble is that when you only overthink sporadically, it results in anxiety. You are better off with low-grade worry! Thanks for Rewinding and this wonderful insight into the overthinkers of the world x

♥α§ђ£ε¥™♥ said...

My family calls it overanalysing and they say I have been doing so since before I knew the word....In other words, it's a natural thing for me. And sometimes it's really horrendous for me!! I'm trying to bring myself to peace with the fact that I will always be overanalytical, or that it will be difficult to break the habit, but then I start overanalysing that too. It's an insufferable cycle from me.

In other words, I totally feel you here. I'd love to be able to have one day where I could be totally un-overanalytical and see what it would be like. But then, I wouldn't be myself.