Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Fashion Po-lice

Now girls and boys. I'm no style guru.
I'm always a season behind and a few bucks short of being even remotely fashionable.
Occasionally, I confuse being colour coordinated with being fashionable, but really I'm just matchin'
- not rockin' or stylin'.

Recently, on a girls' out night the decision was made to head over to quite a 'young' establishment (the clientele, not the building) after dinner.
I used to frequent this place when I was younger, smoother and perkier myself
- so I was happy to pay the ol' girl a visit.

After the novelty of having my ID verified and photo taken for security purposes, I entered the place only to immediately assume that we had mistakenly walked into the middle of a pimps and prostitutes event.

My lovely, new tailored (maternity!) pants instantly stood out like ... well, actual clothing on a non-writhing body.
They were just screaming to be cut off somewhere between my butt cheeks and g-string like all the other so-called 'pants' in the place.

Everywhere I turned, there was flesh.
It was a fleshfest, man!
I thought there was a rule about advertising crotch or cleavage - not both?
I guess rules are made to be broken - by absolutely every female in the place.

There were Kardashian-wannabes flanking penthouse pet-wannabes and plastering themselves all over macdaddy-wannabes every way I looked!!

I'm not sure if I was confused, disgusted or plain envious.

I was no angel in my heyday and I still like to let my hair down on the very odd occasion these days, but...
even at my fittest, I would never have had the confidence to wear a lycra belt as an outfit.
I would also have had serious reservations about combining alcohol and one-false-move-from-public-nudity attire.

I no longer understand why young 'gentlemen' feel the need to download graphic porn in this day and age.
The live shows are obviously freely available on podiums in bars all over this city.

20+ years ago I had to fight for my right to see 'Pretty Woman'.
(Or just diiiiieeee 'cause everyone else was allowed toooooo.)

My Dad didn't want me being exposed to this, you see...

Flash forward 20+ years and without any content warnings we are over exposed to this continuously...

'Vivians' are no longer confined to dodgy street corners.
I wonder how Richard Gere would even know who to proposition in this era?
Wouldn't it would be extremely confusing for 'customers' to distinguish between the real deal and a bunch of teenage girls simply wagging school?

I believe Supre have a lot to answer for.

Or, once again, I may just be basking in my seven visible signs of aging over here.

Shar :-)

Pretty Woman image
Supre image


Tamsyn said...

I hear you on this one. Even at my work functions there seems to be a whole lot of flesh. At a recent awards night there were girls (20ish year olds) wearing skirts more than halfway up their thighs, cleavage flashing tops and cut-out panels across their stomachs. I'm not a prude and definitely wasn't an angel when I was younger, but at work events!? Too much flesh for my liking!

Mama of 2 boys said...

This post is brilliant Shar, brilliant! It made me laugh so much, because it is SO true. I also used to get out and amongst it back in the day, but my risque outfits of yesteryear look like a Nun's habit, in comparison to the fashion of today. I go out from time to time as well and I've noticed the decline in respectable taste in recent years. I totally understand these young hotties wanting to flaunt a bangin' body, but it can still be done tastefully, no?? I think you hit the nail on the head with the reference to 'Kardashian Kraziness', them and a few others in the spotlight have a lot to answer for.

MultipleMum said...

You make me laugh Shar! I feel like this when I venture into a night club. At nearly 40 I think it is just best I don't go there. I was all Bohemian in my hey-day so wore my underwear as outerwear but there was little flesh involved. Imagine what our little girls will be wearing!?! No best we don't I think! x

Karla {Ironmum Karla} said...

he he, scary isn't it, a question I have asked myself also but scared to know the answer as age may be involved somewhere. The clothes on less than perfect bodies = disaster and there are plenty of them out there also!;)x

Nat - Muddy Farmwife said...

Fantastic post Shar!! I have been thinking exactly the same thing recently. Even some of our male friends have said when we've been out that they've felt uncomfortable and haven't known where to look, because it's all out there on display.
I just cannot imagine them being comfortable, let alone how they are able to sit down without showing it all.
My concern is how much smaller those outfits will get before my girls want t be going out to clubs etc, I am terrified already!

Kymmie said...

Shar, you crack me up! I think I'm showing my age over here too, because I agree 200%.



Tales of a Tai Tai said...

Oh, you are SO right!! I feel like a frumpy old hag when I walk the streets these days. Pardon me for not shoving my bum and boobs in your face!! And I wasn't allowed to see Pretty Woman either. It was devastating. But later became my all time favourite film! Great post x

Teresa said...

I hear ya, Shar and at the risk of sounding prudish/old...as the aunt to 6 nieces, I recall being appalled trying to find plain t-shirts for my nieces when they were pre-teens that didn't have some 'suggestive' words sprawled on the front.

Even now with my own daughter I find that I don't want to buy her a shirt that says anything, even 'cutie pie' seems too much - she's only 3, can't she just 'be' without gimick or suggestion.

Sonia @ Life Love and Hiccups said...

I hear you sista, I feel so old and frumpy (even when I am wearing a flashy new outfit) when I visit my old haunt and I look at the young girls and giggle cause once upon a time I totally dressed like that too. ;) xx


It's hooker chic. Without the chic. It's beyond awful. Men like that look for 5 minutes then they want to meet a nice girl they can take home to mama !!! lol It's sad that young girls are so insecure in themselves this is the only way they think they will get male attention. Men much prefer a 'hint' of sexiness. Men love the chase, it's a hunter gatherer thing ! Expressions like 'why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free' come to mind. lol. I'm feeling my age now.