Thursday, February 7, 2013

Sick Of Me?? Me Too.

Ever get sick of yourself??

Right now, I'm sick of my compulsion with perfection.
Or more so - projecting some form of self imposed perfection.

Through January, I think I blow dried my hair a total of four times.
When meeting up with friends or having friends come here to play
- I tuck my short, low maintenance hair behind my ears and let it dry naturally.
The past four kindy drop off mornings I have blow dried my hair.
???
Heaven forbid these new people think I can't manage the boy, the baby, the drop off and my own hairdo.

Magoo's grandparents are kindly bringing him home from school today while I take Missi to her first swimming lesson.
So far, I have straightened cushions, swept half a dog off the patio, emptied the bin, changed the cot sheets, laid out 'after school' clothes for Magoo, made his lunch, picked up toys, tidied the fridge and pantry - and will go and clean shortly.
???
Heaven forbid my husband's family have reason to think that I'm dropping a few balls around here.

I am teaching alongside some new colleagues tomorrow.
I have planned and prepped my lessons to within an inch of my life
- even though I have been competently teaching for the last thirteen years.
I'll run through everything again tonight after I have ironed and laid everyone's clothes (and bags) for tomorrow out just so.
???
Heaven forbid my new colleagues be less than impressed with my form tomorrow.
Or someone has to go looking for a sock around here.

Live a little Mum.
Go on, rip something!!
It feels great. :-)
Uuuuggghh!
I'm so tired of me!
Exhausted by my stupid standards.

Who the heck would want to be friends with a moron who blowdries their hair just to go up to the kindy playground (and babyswim!!!) for goodness sake??? 

Shar :-)

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

I know, we all try and be perfect dont we. Heaven forbid someone should drop of unannounced. I dont know about you but i turn into the crazy cleaning monster who flits and farts around sweeping crumbs from underneath my children. Hehehe. Cos id hate to think my grandparents see the half eaten breakfast still on the table or the unmade beds. Like they care. hehe
Jen

Lisa said...

Shar, you constantly make me giggle with your blog entries! I don't have children but I can definitely relate to the sometime, compulsive? behaviour I do. You are not alone!
xo

JJ said...

Ha ha I haven't had time to read your blog for ages and i've missed it & now sitting here laughing, you've made my day! I will admit I DID change a couple of times this week before Kindy drop off & put some tinted lip balm rather than the 'ol blistex I wear every other day to PG/play dates, and yes I did note what others were wearing, bad isn't it ?!?
My house USED to be clean/tidy & my husband would say everything at right angles before kids...but I've had to let expectations slide a little EVEN though I feel better when it's like that...
X

Mama of 2 boys said...

Awww you're being too harsh on yourself Shar. I am a lot like you my friend, it can be very tiring.
I have even been thinking about what to wear for the drop offs this week, so as not to appear too daggy, but not too over the top either. I'm sure no one gives a hoot what I'm wearing anyway... all in the mind.
My cheeky Angus always asks who is coming to visit when I go on a cleaning frenzy, like I don't keep a clean house for my family alone, haha! He is so onto me ;)
xo

Jane said...

Oh Shar, you darling girl. You know I get this, as a recovering perfectionist. I think having the pixies has cured me of it. Just wait - they are very adept at shifting one's priorities! J x

Mandy Ferry said...

I can totally relate. I get so frustrated with the kids sometimes because of the mess, and then I need to remind myself they are kids and the only person who cares is myself. work in progress.